We’re living in an age where very few things last. Everything in our world seems to be in a constant state of flux, and it feels like we hardly have any influence over the way things keep changing.
By now, every one of us has had the experience of showing up at our favorite café only to discover that a casino (or something like it) has opened in its place.
The professional world has become more unpredictable, too. Not to mention our personal relationships: we make friends quickly, and we lose them just as quickly.
Even love has become interchangeable, thanks to so many online dating platforms where we can fulfill our every need. (If our partnerships are going through a rough patch, this can lead to more than a few surprises.)
On one hand, all of this fluidity is a sign of progress. On the other hand, it seems like most of the familiar and reliable things in our lives are disappearing.
In the face of so much change, it’s easy to lose our bearings and feel as vulnerable as a tiny boat in a stormy ocean. In this case, we either need nerves of steel or a “nothing really matters” attitude—or both.
However, there’s one constant that remains in the midst of this fragile scenario: you.
Ultimately, you’re the one who takes care of yourself over the course of your life. You’re the one who carries yourself through all of life’s twists and turns. Only you can take responsibility for the ups and downs in your life!
And no one can take this responsibility away from you. This is why it’s so important to create a stable, resilient psychological core, to build and maintain what I call an “inner anchor.”
When you have an inner anchor, the changes and upheavals you’ll inevitably face in your life don’t throw you off track.
What exactly is an inner anchor—and what does it consist of?
From my point of view, it consists of three key components:
- The ability to accept things as they are
- The ability to let things go
- A healthy amount of self-love
When you build these three attributes, you improve your ability to cope with your external circumstances, no matter how serious they seem. You adopt an “it-is-what-it-is” attitude: if you can’t change your circumstances, then you learn to face them with calm and acceptance.
So what can you do to strengthen your inner anchor? Here are some powerful tools and exercises that I use:
- Meditate at least 15 minutes a day—to create distance from your surface thoughts and connect with your true self.
- If you perceive a problem in your life, acknowledge its right to exist.
- Explore 3 possible solutions to this problem, and choose the one with the greatest long-term implications.
- If you can’t solve the problem, let it be, and observe what happens as though you’re a spectator at a play.
- Be conscious of your inner dialogue, taking care to focus on your freedom and independence. TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR THOUGHTS!
- Look at yourself and your life in the context of the larger universe. This helps bring your ideas and assumptions into perspective.
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