In recent surveys of people living in committed relationships, 50% of respondents admitted to having sex outside their primary relationship at least once.
This is in spite of the fact that most people rank fidelity and honesty at the top of their list of relationship requirements.
What drives people to have sex outside their relationships? And why is it so exciting when a sexual affair literally falls into their laps?
Does an affair spell the end of a relationship? Should people discuss their affairs with their partners?
I think there are two main factors to consider here:
Whether both partners can completely satisfy their sexual needs within the relationship.
Each partner’s ability to see themselves as an object of desire.
If there’s a big gap between partners in terms of their sexual fantasies and/or how often they want to have sex, it can have a negative impact on their sex life as a couple.
And it’s equally problematic if one partner doesn’t feel attractive or desired.
Of course there are other things that can damage the sex lives of people in long-term relationships, including the boredom and routine that tends to set in over time—and we don’t want to underestimate them.
While an affair can’t save a sexual relationship, it can help point out where it might be lacking. It can also serve as a reminder of a person’s attractiveness and worth.
I did some research on a popular Internet dating site to see how many contact requests a woman over 50 could get. Within 10 minutes, there were 45 contact requests, from men ages 18 to 80!
So if you’re a woman who’s reading this, I’d like to tell you that there’s no need to put up with chronic sexual dissatisfaction in your relationship. And I want to give you full permission to live out your sexuality.
That said, even if you want to live out your sexuality, you don’t necessarily need to have a sexual affair if you’re in an otherwise healthy relationship.
But if you do choose to have an affair, it’s important to think it through beforehand.
Here are some tips to consider:
Never have unprotected sex outside a committed partnership—you don’t want to risk any kind of infection for you or your partner.
Think about the real reasons you’re having an affair.
Talk with your partner about it hypothetically, or in the third person (what would happen if…?)
Only tell your partner about the affair if it affects your future together. If you’re looking to ease your conscience, do it in a therapy session or with someone you trust.
Learn from the affair and accept the consequences if necessary.
Think about the possibility that the affair could develop into the love of your life!
Staying young as you grow old doesn’t happen just like that. You have to work at it. But when you put in the effort, you can lower your biological age to the point where it’s well below the age written in your passport.
Along with a regular fitness routine, a healthy diet and getting enough rest, there’s another key component to lowering your biological age: taking nutritional supplements. In the biohacking world, supplements are a definite must!
Nutritional supplements don’t just support the body’s functional and regenerative capabilities. They can also help counteract the effects of aging. And some—like vitamin D in the winter—are indispensable.
Nutritional supplements include everything from multivitamins and skin-supporting substances like hyaluronic acid and collagen (which are naturally produced in the human body, but diminish with age) to newfangled plant extracts like fisetin and quercetin.
The range of supplements on the market nowadays is as wide-ranging as it is confusing. Determining which ones are effective (and which aren’t) depends on your reasons for taking them.
When it comes to taking supplements and lowering your biological age, it’s important to focus on the following health goals:
Preserving vein elasticity and cardiac performance
Strengthening the bones and maintaining the functionality of the joints
Counteracting micro-inflammations and rapidly disposing of bodily waste
Here’s a list of nutritional supplements I’ve had good experiences with—and noticeable positive results:
Daily:
Spermidine (6mg)
Selenium (50mg)
Magnesium (400mg before going to sleep)
In alternating 4-week cycles:
Omega-3 and -6 fatty acids
Vitamin B, C, and E complex
Glucosamine and chondroitin capsules
Reishi mushroom capsules
Ashwagandha capsules
Quercetin capsules
Amino Acids or Nucleotides
Once a month over 2 days:
Fisetin (1500mg)
In the winter months, from November to May:
Vitamin D (20mg per day), ideally in combination with vitamin K and calcium
Besides the supplements I’ve mentioned above, collagen is especially important, since it contains valuable components for skin, tendon and joint health. Due to its high protein content (9g per tablespoon of powder), collagen can be a healthy way to increase your daily protein intake: mix 1 – 2 tablespoons into soups or drinks as needed.
The same goes for CBD oil (a derivative of the cannabis plant that doesn’t contain any intoxicating chemicals), which is full of healthy vital substances and has a relaxing effect on the body. Take it as needed!
Anyone who considers themselves a biohacker has taken an ice bath and is no stranger to the breathing methods of Wim Hof.
The concept of “cold” might not seem too tempting or seductive on the surface. The word conjures up images of icy Siberian winters and Arctic icebreakers. It even gives some people goose bumps.
At the same time, we have the cold to thank for beautiful, snow-covered winter landscapes—and for a delicious dessert we simply call “ice cream.”
When it’s cold, of course we feel cold. And we automatically long for warming rays of sunshine. Yet we actually need the cold to some degree.
It’s long been a scientific fact that cold temperatures have a positive stimulating effect on our health—and that they can slow the aging process. This is one of the key principles of biohacking.
Breathing is another key biohacking principle. Generally speaking, our breathing is too shallow and too quick. Especially in stressful situations. The result? An inadequate supply of oxygen to the body.
On the other hand, deep, slow breathing gives the body’s cells the necessary volume of “air to breathe.” Deep breathing also activates the vagus nerve, which is responsible for relaxation and restful sleep (two things that are more important to our health than ever in light of our current circumstances).
The Internet is full of recommendations for and examples of deep breathing exercises.
When it comes to deep breathing, I lean toward the methods of Wim Hof, which are firmly established in the biohacking scene.
Here are my “cold + breathing” tips for every day and everyone:
After getting up in the morning, take a cold shower for at least 30 seconds. and/or
Give your face an ice bath: take a deep breath and plunge your face into a bowl of cold water and ice cubes. Hold for 10 seconds. Repeat 3-4 times.
Walk for 30 minutes every day, no matter what the weather.
Swim in cold water (for advanced practitioners)
Practice Wim Hof’s breathing methods twice a day:
Method #1
Take 30 quick but deep breaths into the abdomen.
After your last exhale, hold until the breathing reflex kicks in (that is, until you feel a strong urge to breathe)
Inhale deeply into the abdomen, exhale, inhale again, hold your breath for 15 seconds, and exhale.
Method #2: “Anti-stress” or “anger-reducing” breathing exercise
Inhale deeply into the abdomen, counting slowly to 7.
Pause for 4 seconds. Purse your lips as if you’re going to whistle.
Exhale slowly through pursed lips, counting to 10. Repeat 3 to 10 times (depending on your stress level).
We’re living in an age where very few things last. Everything in our world seems to be in a constant state of flux, and it feels like we hardly have any influence over the way things keep changing.
By now, every one of us has had the experience of showing up at our favorite café only to discover that a casino (or something like it) has opened in its place.
The professional world has become more unpredictable, too. Not to mention our personal relationships: we make friends quickly, and we lose them just as quickly.
Even love has become interchangeable, thanks to so many online dating platforms where we can fulfill our every need. (If our partnerships are going through a rough patch, this can lead to more than a few surprises.)
On one hand, all of this fluidity is a sign of progress. On the other hand, it seems like most of the familiar and reliable things in our lives are disappearing.
In the face of so much change, it’s easy to lose our bearings and feel as vulnerable as a tiny boat in a stormy ocean. In this case, we either need nerves of steel or a “nothing really matters” attitude—or both.
However, there’s one constant that remains in the midst of this fragile scenario: you.
Ultimately, you’re the one who takes care of yourself over the course of your life. You’re the one who carries yourself through all of life’s twists and turns. Only you can take responsibility for the ups and downs in your life!
And no one can take this responsibility away from you. This is why it’s so important to create a stable, resilient psychological core, to build and maintain what I call an “inner anchor.”
When you have an inner anchor, the changes and upheavals you’ll inevitably face in your life don’t throw you off track.
What exactly is an inner anchor—and what does it consist of?
From my point of view, it consists of three key components:
When you build these three attributes, you improve your ability to cope with your external circumstances, no matter how serious they seem. You adopt an “it-is-what-it-is” attitude: if you can’t change your circumstances, then you learn to face them with calm and acceptance.
So what can you do to strengthen your inner anchor? Here are some powerful tools and exercises that I use:
Meditate at least 15 minutes a day—to create distance from your surface thoughts and connect with your true self.
If you perceive a problem in your life, acknowledge its right to exist.
Explore 3 possible solutions to this problem, and choose the one with the greatest long-term implications.
If you can’t solve the problem, let it be, and observe what happens as though you’re a spectator at a play.
Most people think putting a lot of effort into their physical appearance is a superficial thing to do. But is that really the case?
If you’re trying to improve your appearance by focusing mainly on things like body shaping, keeping up with the latest fashion trends, and makeup, then I see it as superficial, too.
Yet we know for a fact that people make their decisions about someone’s attractiveness based on first impressions—which usually don’t last longer than 10 seconds.
With that in mind, we might want to ask ourselves: How do we want to come across to others—and what kind of impression do we want to make?
There are two factors that significantly influence our perception of someone’s personality:
their inner qualities
their charisma
The key is to bring these inner attributes to the surface, so they’re visible to others.
Attributes like fitness, nutrition, and various lifestyle vices (like smoking and drinking too much alcohol) are immediately apparent. So is the way we dress.
If we don’t put much thought into what we wear, if we neglect our nails and teeth, or let our hair go for months without a visit to the salon, then we’re making a clear statement.
That statement might go something like this: “I don’t care about my appearance—you’ve got to love me for who I am on the inside!” (Provided you know who you are on the inside.)
As important as they are, our inner qualities aren’t always attractive, at least not right away. The same is true in the animal world—which we also happen to be part of. So it’s definitely worth the effort to make a good impression in an “animalistic” sense.
And how can we do this? It starts with bringing our personalities into harmony with our outward appearance.
For example, if you don’t like to wear high heels, then you won’t look good in them. But a good cosmetic treatment, just like a session with a good stylist, can work wonders.
Here are my 10 tips for maintaining an impressive appearance that can open doors:
To put it simply, it’s a movement whose goals go way beyond the idea of leading a “healthy lifestyle.”
Biohacking started over ten years ago among groups of young scientists and students in California, who began to systematically evaluate their physical, spiritual, and emotional health, as well as analyze their living conditions and environment. Their goal? To maximize individual performance and increase overall well-being.
In a nutshell: biohacking is about self-optimization. Finding the best version of yourself!
It incorporates the latest scientific and technological advances in the fields of health and wellness, developing them further and applying them in a practical context.
In other words, biohacking is an effective and applicable set of science-based practices that generate real results—and are easily adaptable to each person’s needs and goals.
Given its effectiveness, the number of biohacking enthusiasts around the world is growing steadily. I’m one of them.
Maximilian Gotzler, the founder of FlowGrade, is the most well-known biohacking advocate in Germany.
Although most people who practice biohacking are relatively young, the methods are particularly useful when it comes to anti-aging.
Anyone who commits to the principles of biohacking and adjusts their daily routine accordingly has a good chance of staying healthy and supple — i.e., young — for a longer period of time!
Fortunately, the practices are easy to integrate into everyday life and require just one thing: consistency!
What’s important to keep in mind: Movement, nutrition, and relaxation have an enormous influence on your health, performance, and biological age. Biohacking integrates specific recommendations in each of these key areas that significantly increase your likelihood of achieving successful results.
With that in mind, here are my 10 essential biohacks that everyone can start with:
Take a cold shower for approximately 30 seconds every morning.
Spend one hour a day outside, i.e. in natural sunlight.
Work out to the point of sweating at least 3 times per week.
Take 5 deep belly breaths at least three times a day. Meditate for 15 minutes a day, ideally before going to bed.
Eat as little sugar and carbohydrates—like pasta, rice, and potatoes—as possible. Substitute them with vegetables and protein-rich foods. Drink 2.5 liters of water per day. Depending on your individual needs, take nutritional supplements.
Wear blue light-blocking glasses in the evenings, and turn off all screens 1 hour before going to bed.
Take 400mg of magnesium every evening. This relaxes the muscles and improves sleep quality.
Practice interval fasting—allowing at least 16 hours between dinner and breakfast the next morning—at least 3 times per week.
Have sex frequently.
Get at least 7.5 hours of sleep every night – 9 hours are even better! Your bedroom should be absolutely dark (use sleep-mask), noiseless and have the temprerature about 16-18 degrees. (How to sleep better)
Society has never considered it a problem for younger women to be with older men—provided that they have enough fame, power and money to justify the relationship.
Although a lot has changed over the years, most people still look at relationships between older women and younger men through a different lens.
Let’s take a closer look at these relationship dynamics.
When it comes to having children, there are advantages in not waiting too long. However, most women want to ensure they have sufficient emotional and financial support before having children. In this case, a man who’s mature, experienced and well off financially is a perfect match!
From an evolutionary point of view, though, children want parents who are in a similar physiological condition.
When children grow up, this can become a problem. Why? As they grow older, women tend to focus more and more on their own needs in search of fulfillment.
As their children enter adulthood, most women come into bloom. They feel more confident. They know exactly what they want—and what they don’t want. Most importantly, they suddenly feel an increased need for sex. Unlike mothers and grandmothers of past generations, they also look much younger, thanks to modern ideas and innovations around lifestyle.
The biological and mental differences between men and women—which increasingly diverge from age 40 onwards—can become a problem in this phase of life.
Having made themselves comfortable in their romantic relationships, many men experience decreasing testosterone levels.
Statistically speaking, the life expectancy of men is about 8 years less than women. What’s more, studies have found that men in their 50s have 30% more brain shrinkage than women of a similar age.
Though of course this can vary from person to person.
For all these reasons, many mature women are beginning to seek out younger partners. Ultimately, they’re looking for someone who’s on the same wavelength sexually and psychologically. The older the woman, the more this desire comes into play.
Women over 50 who are physically active and know how to take good care of themselves tend to leave their male counterparts in the dust! (For more on this topic, see my post:BioAge ; How you can lower your Biological Age
Given this reality, it’s time we recognize couples in which the woman is 8 or 10 years (or more) older than her partner as “normal” and socially acceptable!
In this spirit, I’d like to encourage women not to shy away from considering much younger men as partners—and not to have any hang-ups about it.
Since older women are such a great match for them, younger men generally and genuinely love and take great care of them throughout the relationship.
Scientifically speaking, when it comes to our experience of the world, just 10% consists of actual events—the other 90% is our reactions to them.
This 90% varies as widely as people’s lifestyles in different parts of the world. The world is beautiful or terrible, depending on how we (want to) see it.
I’m not talking about extreme situations like war or natural disasters. I’m not talking about looking at the world through rose-colored glasses, either. What I’m talking about is focusing on the positive, and either accepting or working to change the negative. Instead of putting yourself at the mercy of a worldview, I’m talking about trying to shape your experience of the world as much as you can.
I’ll show you how to turn a half-empty glass into a half-full one.
Do you have an inner critic or partner who wakes up with you and serves up your worries for breakfast? Is your stress level so high that you have no idea how to bring it down? Are you unsure about how to deal with the fears that other people project onto you? What about all your “good intentions”—to exercise more often, eat healthier, and sleep better?
You’ll find answers to these questions in my posts on this site.
In the meantime, I’d like to share with you my 10 personal strategies for experiencing the world in a more positive way—and feeling better in the process:
After waking up, take some time for your morning rituals. Give your worries and problems a break. You gave them some of your time yesterday. Celebrate each new day as if it’s a gift.
Review your to-do list. Schedule a 10-15 minute break between each task to move and do some deep breathing.
Be grateful that you can experience the world in the first place. Try to look at it without judgment.
Once a day, do something that takes you out of your comfort zone. Try something new! It can be something small, like walking on an unfamiliar path or trying an unusual flavor of chocolate. In the meantime, check in with yourself: “How am I doing right now? What feelings are coming up—and why?”
Celebrate every success, no matter how small it seems. The key here is not to set the bar too high. Reward yourself with things that bring you joy.
Practice self-love and try not leave too much room for self-criticism. Choose to focus on your strengths and achievements.
Set aside about an hour each day to reflect on worries and problems. Write down 3 solutions for each problem. Choose the solution that most appeals to you and break it down into small steps, with a deadline.
If someone offends you, question their behavior. Why did they talk or act this way? What’s their motivation? Why did I react the way I did? Remember: most personal attacks are based on other people’s fears, lack of self-esteem, or projections of their own problems. Try not to take everything personally! Surround yourself with people who think positively. Avoid spoilsports and whiners.
Forgive yourself for your mistakes—and learn from them.
Forgive others for their mistakes—and learn from them.
Happy Dancing Antiaging Work-out barefoot on a green ground. Watch here how to stay fit and fexible without any equipment with dancing work outs! Click below on “read more” to watch a video!
The 10 best quick meals for long-term health and fitness!
These days, when it comes to cooking, there are three important benchmarks:
It has to be quick.
It has to be healthy.
It has to taste good.
Here are 10 recipes for dishes that more than satisfy all three of these criteria. Each recipe serves 2 people and takes about 15 to 20 minutes to make.
Russian Borscht Stew with Buckwheat
Russian Stew with buckwheat
1 medium-sized head white cabbage
1 fresh red beet
1 large carrot
2 medium-sized tomatoes
1 thick slice celery root
½ a leek
2-3 large mushrooms or 1 handful chanterelle mushrooms
150 grams buckwheat grains
2 tablespoons vegetable broth powder
Olive oil
Parsley
Slice the vegetables and the mushrooms. Boil 1 liter of water and add the vegetable broth powder to dissolve. Add the sliced vegetables, mushrooms, and buckwheat grains. Cook for 10 minutes at low heat. Finish with a generous dash of olive oil and a handful of chopped parsley.
Serve with a spoonful of hummus and/or sour cream.
Fish fillet (for example, smoked mackerel, as shown here) with FriedPimientos and Blue Cheese Porridge
Fish-Filet with mush potatoes and roasted pimientos
1 smoked mackerel
Alternative: use salmon or any other fish you prefer, season with salt, pepper, a tablespoon of olive oil, and a few drops of balsamic vinegar, then bake in foil for 20 minutes at 185 °
1 bag of green pimientos (a.k.a. pimientos de padron)
2 or 3 potatoes
50 grams of blue cheese
100 milliliters milk
Salt, pepper, and olive or rapeseed oil for sautéing
Fresh tomato slices for garnish
Remove the skin and bones from the mackerel. Fry the pimientos in oil with salt and pepper. Boil the potatoes in salted water, drain ¾ of the water, add the blue cheese and milk, and mash together with a fork or a potato masher.
Serve with a few slices of fresh tomato.
Vegetable Pancakes with Herb Quark, Hummus, and Mixed Green Salad
Feel younger with healthy food
Vegetable pancakes (or potato pancakes), hummus, and herb quark from the deli counter at your favorite supermarket
Salad ingredients: organic mâche greens (a.k.a. lamb’s lettuce), ½ cucumber, 2 tomatoes, green onion
2 tablespoons olive, sunflower, or MCT oil
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
Salt and pepper
Warm the vegetable pancakes in the oven at 180°C for 15 minutes. Combine the greens with the chopped cucumber, tomato, green onion, salt, pepper, oil, and vinegar.
Remove the vegetable pancakes from the oven, place on large plate, top with herb quark and hummus, and serve with salad on the side.
The Classic: Fried Potatoes with Eggs Sunny-Side-Up and Fresh Sauerkraut
Fried potatoes with eggs and sauerkraut-salad.
2 or 3 new potatoes
Organic eggs
150 grams fresh sauerkraut per person (barrel-cured is best)
1 or 2 green onions, chopped
Seasoned salt and pepper
1 tablespoon maple syrup
Caraway seeds
1 tablespoon flaxseed or sunflower oil
Rapeseed or olive oil for frying
Peel potatoes and slice them as you prefer. Place potatoes in a skillet with olive or rapeseed oil and chopped green onion and brown for 7-10 minutes. While the potatoes are cooking, combine the maple syrup, a pinch of caraway seeds, and flaxseed oil with the sauerkraut. Place the fried potatoes on a large plate with the sauerkraut on the side. Cook the eggs in the same skillet you used to fry the potatoes, sprinkling them with seasoned salt. Lay the eggs atop the fried potatoes and serve.
Red Lentil-Vegetable Soup
Red Lentil Soup with vegetables
500 milliliters organic vegetable broth
200 grams red lentils
50 grams fresh ginger
100 grams chanterelle or porcini mushrooms
200 grams broccoli, green asparagus, or another favorite vegetable
1 bunch of “soup vegetables” (1 rib celery or 1 piece of celery root, 1 leek, 1 handful curly parsley, and 1 carrot, as needed)
2 tablespoons olive or MCT oil
Parsley
Bring the vegetable broth to a boil. Rinse the lentils and add them to the broth. Grate the ginger directly into the broth. Wash and chop the mushrooms and vegetables, and add them to the pot. Cook for 10 minutes. Finish with oil and a handful of parsley.
Serve the soup with a spoonful of sour cream.
Tortellini with Jumbo Shrimp
Tortellini with Jumbo Shrimp
1 package fresh tortellini pasta
400 grams jumbo shrimp
1 green onion, chopped
2-3 cloves garlic
2 medium-sized tomatoes
4-5 marinated sun-dried tomatoes
100 grams whole green olives
1 chili pepper
1 tablespoon organic vegetable broth powder
30 grams of Parmesan cheese
Olive or rapeseed oil for sautéing
Add shrimp, vegetable broth powder, chopped green onions, olives, and chili to a wok and sauté in olive oil. Meanwhile, chop the garlic, sun-dried tomatoes, and fresh tomatoes. Bring a large pot of water to a boil, add salt, and add tortellini, cooking for about 4 minutes. Drain the pasta. When the shrimp are red and cooked through, add the rest of the chopped vegetables to the wok, and cook, stirring frequently, for about 3 minutes. Add the drained tortellini to the wok and stir to combine.
Serve in pasta bowls and garnish with freshly grated Parmesan.
Mixed Green Salad with Seaweed and Tofu
Green salad with seawead and roasted tofu
250 grams mâche greens (a.k.a. lamb’s lettuce)
2 or 3 medium-sized tomatoes
1 cucumber
1 ripe avocado
1 green onion
Seaweed salad from the deli counter
Your favorite salad dressing
200 grams firm tofu
50 milliliters soy sauce
Rapeseed oil for sautéing
Cut tofu in to large pieces and marinate for 10 minutes in soy sauce. Chop the salad ingredients and combine with the dressing. Serve on two large plates, spooning the seaweed salad over the top. Heat oil in a wok and cook the soy sauce-marinated tofu until well browned.
Arrange the browned tofu pieces over the salad and serve.
Kefir-Spelt Pancakes with Cottage Cheese
Kefir-Spelt Pancakes with cottage cheese
250 milliliters kefir
2 eggs
4 heaping tablespoons spelt flour
Cottage cheese
1 container fresh raspberries
1 tablespoon honey
Flaxseeds (about 1 tablespoon)
A pinch of salt
Butter, plus oil for cooking
Preheat oven to approximately 70°C. Combine the kefir, eggs, and spelt flour, and add a pinch of salt. In a small pan, fry the pancakes in a little oil, brush them with butter, and place them in the preheated oven on a plate to keep warm. In a bowl, smash the raspberries and combine them with honey and flaxseeds.
Serve the pancakes with cottage cheese and garnish with spoonfuls of the raspberry mixture.
Pasta with Stir-fried Zucchini and Mozzarella
Pasta with vegetables and Mozzarella
2 small zucchini
1 green onion
½ red bell pepper
100 grams of your favorite mushroom
2 medium-sized tomatoes
1 clove garlic
1 tablespoon organic vegetable broth powder
2 large balls of fresh mozzarella
30 grams Parmesan cheese
Oil for sautéing
Freshly ground pepper
Tagliatelle noodles for two
Cook the pasta in boiling salted water according to the package directions. Drain. Chop the vegetables, mushrooms, tomato, and garlic and sauté in a large skillet with oil, vegetable broth powder, and ground pepper. Add the cooked, drained pasta to the skillet and stir well to combine.
Divide into two pasta bowls, top each with a ball of mozzarella, and sprinkle with freshly grated Parmesan.
Sautéed Vegetables with Chicken Strips
Roasted vegetables with chicken strips
300 grams boneless, skinless chicken breast
300 grams green asparagus (or another favorite vegetable)
Green onion
1 yellow bell pepper
1 rib celery
1 clove garlic
2 tablespoons olive oil
Balsamic vinegar, approximately 1 tablespoon
1 tablespoon organic vegetable broth powder
1 medium-sized tomato
Marinate chicken breast in 2 tablespoons of olive oil, 1 tablespoon of balsamic vinegar, and salt and pepper to taste for 1 hour. After marinating, cut chicken breast into strips.
Chop the asparagus (or other vegetable), green onion, yellow bell pepper, celery, and garlic and sauté in olive oil for 5-7 minutes. Divide the vegetables between two plates. While the pan is still hot, brown the chicken strips for 3-4 minutes over high heat. Place the browned chicken strips on top of the vegetables. Garnish with slices of fresh tomato.
